A Woman After God’s Own Heart

I’ve been trying—for what feels like the hundredth time—to follow a Bible reading plan that takes you through the entire Bible in a year. I’ve started this project before, full of enthusiasm and good intentions, only to lose steam a few weeks or months in. I would fall behind a few days, feel guilty, and then quietly give up when the distance between me and the plan felt too wide to close.

But this year has felt different.

I’ve given myself grace for the days I fall behind and have remained determined to keep going. I’ve stopped reading just to check a box and started reading to listen. Each day I ask, “God, what do You want me to see in this?” And what I’ve found is that when I lean in—even when I’m tired or distracted—He speaks.

Lately, He’s been speaking through the story of David.

For most of my life, I saw David as one of the Bible’s heroes. The boy who slayed Goliath. The worshipper. The king. The man after God’s own heart. I’d heard about his affair with Bathsheba, and I assumed that was his one dark moment—his single failure.

But as I read through 1 and 2 Samuel, I was stunned.

Not only did David commit adultery, but even after being forgiven and restored, he went on to disobey God repeatedly. He made choices that led to pain, destruction, and death. And yet—God still loved him. God still used him. God still called him His own.

David’s Repeated Disobedience

Infraction	Scripture Reference	What Happened
Polygamy	2 Samuel 5:13	David took many wives and concubines—against God’s design for marriage.
Adultery with Bathsheba	2 Samuel 11	David saw a woman bathing, took her, and got her pregnant—knowing she was another man’s wife.
Murder of Uriah	2 Samuel 11	To cover up the pregnancy, he arranged for Bathsheba’s husband to be killed in battle.
Parental Negligence	2 Samuel 13–18	He failed to confront his son Amnon for raping Tamar, leading to Absalom’s revenge and rebellion.
A Prideful Census	2 Samuel 24	David ordered a military census in pride and self-reliance. God responded with a deadly plague.
Trusting in Enemies	1 Samuel 27	Out of fear, he sought safety with the Philistines and even offered to fight for them.

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As I read these stories—these painful, messy, complicated accounts—I heard the Lord whisper something that shifted everything in my spirit—it was as if a veil had been lifted, and suddenly I saw His heart more clearly.

“I knew everything David would do—and I still chose him. I still loved him. I still delighted in him.”

And in that moment, I felt His presence wash over me.
“I knew everything you would do,” He said, “and I still chose you. I loved you then and I love you now. I took delight in you then, and I delight in you now. You are a woman after My own heart.”

I’ve carried shame for years—for decisions I made, for paths I took, for times I knew better and still chose wrong. But God isn’t looking for perfection. He’s looking for a heart that turns back to Him, again and again. David was deeply flawed—but he was also deeply surrendered. He repented. He worshipped. He trusted. And God, in His mercy, stayed close.

If you’ve ever found the Bible boring or irrelevant, maybe it’s because you’ve been skimming the surface. But underneath the words is the heartbeat of a God who sees you fully, loves you deeply, and delights in speaking to you through every page.

You won’t just find history in these stories—you’ll find hope.

And perhaps, like me, you’ll begin to believe that you too…
are someone after God’s own heart.